twenty minutes
by planless
Summary: Because sometimes, that's all it takes. Between a turbulent engagement and highly confusing marriage, Sakura and Neji find that, more often than not, twenty minutes is all that's needed to make it work. [NejiSaku]
1. one glass in

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**one glass in**

* * *

_"Will you marry me?"_

Sakura almost drops the glass of wine she's been sipping on languidly for the last twenty minutes. Already, she can feel the faint buzz of alcohol tingle through her body as she stares at the scene in front of her with wide eyes. Gripping the glass in her hand tighter, she leans back against the wall in an effort not to keel over from shock.

Naruto looks about the same as she feels – white as a sheet and ready to faint. Hinata is pressing her hands to her flaming cheeks, mouth opening and snapping shut repeatedly. Next to her, Ino seems to have stopped breathing altogether, gripping a plate full of canapés in a white-knuckled grip that has the porcelain cracking.

Two dozen milky-white eyes are staring at her, unblinkingly.

Neji looks up at her from where he is sitting on the ground, kneeling in perfect kiza, back ramrod straight and dressed in the same traditional robes as the rest of his clansmen whose eyes now swivel to bore holes into his back. The heavy cloth drapes elegantly around his shoulders, falling down his torso in soft pleats.

It might keep his family from seeing the tension in his shoulders, and how his back is strung so tight his spine seems close to snapping.

It does nothing to hide from her the way his hands are balled into fists on his thighs, the muscle that jumps at his jaw, or those damn white eyes that look up at her unblinkingly, carrying in them a mixture of hope and fear and insecurity and every other conceivable emotion between here and the sun that goes straight to Sakura's heart.

Stunned into stupidity, fuelled by decade old and sinfully expensive wine, Sakura blurts out the first thing that comes to her mind.

"Okay."

* * *

**A/N: **Hello hello!

First of all, thank you for checking in. I hope you're as curious as I am to see where this story goes! For those of you who are interested in following, please note that

1) I have no idea where I am going with this. I'm currently in the middle of my bachelor thesis and need something to take my mind of things.

2) this is not a plot-heavy monster. It's more like loosely connected little snippets taken out of everyday life. Kinda like my **Colder Spots**, if you've read that! :)

3) OOCness. Probably. I know that I tend to tweak at least Sakura's personality more than just a bit, but what can I say. I do hate the job Kishimoto has done on her. So much potential, wasted.

Hopefully, some of you will be along for the ride!

Love,

planless


	2. say no to this

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**say no to this**

* * *

"How could you do that?!" Ino screeches.

Sakura winces. Her best friend has been going at it non-stop for the past twenty minutes, in a voice so shrill it makes her ears ring and, she is quite positive, the windows rattle.

"How could you date Hyuga _fucking _Neji and _not tell me_?! How? I thought we were best friends! And Tenten! She must have known! Ohh, wait until I get my hands around her traitorous little neck, I'll –" She stops to take a breath and Sakura butts in.

"We're not dating," she blurts out.

Ino, who's already gearing up for round two, falters and for perhaps the first time in their life-long friendship, Sakura sees her friend speechless.

"You're shitting me."

Hugging her pillow tighter to her chest and burying her face in it, Sakura shakes her head. There is a momentary silence, then all the fight leaves Ino in one heavy breath. The mattress dips as she flops down onto the bed.

"Then – why? Now, I get why he would propose to you – you're a sound party. And you don't look half bad, despite that ridiculous forehead…" A break. Ino is probably waiting for the indignant cry that always follows this particular taunt, but Sakura can't find it in her to care. Ino sighs. "It's not unusual for the more traditional families to propose without a pre-existing relationship, but Sakura – why, why on earth would you say yes? There was no obligation, no expectation, no understanding – no one was expecting it. Hell, not even you were expecting it, from the looks of it!"

Sakura remains silent. How can she explain to her friend, that in the very moment he proposed, proud Neji Hyuga seemed to her not a man but a boy? A boy, branded and pushed aside his entire life, relegated to a life in the back rungs, only to be dragged out of the shadow into the light and thrust into position as clan heir as the two houses joined?

Sakura has been filing Tsunade's paperwork long enough to suspect an ulterior motive behind the move. Clans are not known for their magnanimous policies and soft hearts. This is not a show of good will and overcome animosity. It is political in motivation, a game to climb the ranks. She's sure of it. And yet… What for the entirety of the clan amounts to a show of good faith, a move to curry favour with the future hokage, must be a life-changing event for Neji.

He was scared.

She saw it in his eyes, in the way his hands clenched, and the way he's grown even more quiet and reclusive ever since the announcement that the main and branch houses would conjoin.

And in that moment, her stupid, drunk heart went out to him. Because she knows what it is like to be pushed around, she knows what it is like to fear failure, to come up short. She understands, intimately.

And her silly, bleeding heart thought in unfair to force that on him.

And so she said yes.

"You can still break off the engagement, you know?" Ino's voice filters through her tumultuous thoughts.

Sakura lifts her head to glance at her. Her friend nods enthusiastically, a plan seemingly forming in her mind.

"No contract has been drawn up or signed, you can just say you changed your mind. You were drunk anyway, so there's no way it's legally binding. Nobody would blame you for chickening out. It's the Hyuga clan, after all. Just go tell him you're not ready for that kind of relationship or responsibility, I'm sure he'll understand. I mean, it's Neji, the man practically grew up with responsibility shoved down his throat. He'll get it."

Sakura frowns, for the first time in hours seeing a glimmer of hope on the horizon.  
"You know what, Ino-pig?" She asks, determination sparking, then slowly catching fire in her chest.

"I think you're right. I'll talk to him."

* * *

**A/N.: **Hello lovelies!  
It's update Monday!  
Thank you to all the people who have followed or faved this story after just one chapter; or even to those who just read it.

I hope the second chapter does an okay job at keeping you interested in the story. The next chapter will have Neji guest-starring.

Thank you, **Tobiramamara**, for leaving a review on that lone first chapter. I realise that there's not yet a lot to say about this story, so the fact that you made the effort to leave a comment anyways is really sweet.

Also a lil' Hamilton reference in here, because why not. Hamilton is great.

I hope you all have a good day!  
Love,

planless


	3. all in a day's work

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**all in a day's work**

* * *

Sakura smoothes down nonexistent wrinkles in her shirt as she goes over what she is going to tell Neji for the umpteenth time.

She'll open with an apology, she thinks, leaning closer to the mirror of her vanity and rubbing at the dark stains beneath her eyes. Sleep has not been kind to her the last couple of days.

Open and close with an apology, she nods, giving up on her face and dragging a brush through her hair before leaving well enough alone. If fretting over her appearance for near twenty minutes does not get the job done, nothing else will.

Everything in between – well, she'll just go with whatever her gut tells her.

Right now, it tells her that she's feeling sick and about to lose her breakfast. Nerves.

Sakura sighs and trudges through her tiny apartment, pulls on her shoes. After a few moments of deliberation, she twists up her hair into a bun and fixes it in place with a senbon.

There. At least now she feels slightly more armed.

Slightly more prepared to get the job done.

She gives her appearance one last once-over in the full body mirror. Standard jonin gear, minus the flak jacket. He might try to throw some punches, after all, so the getup is appropriate.

Then the corners of her mouth tug down. She's being unfair. Neji is always so calm and collected and, above all else, rational.

He'll understand.

Sakura grabs her keys and pulls open the apartment door only to freeze at the sight in front of her. There stands Neji, one hand poised to knock. Their eyes meet and Sakura's heart stutters. For a moment, they stare at each other like deer in the headlights.

It is Neji who takes the first step.

"I –" He clears his throat softly. "Sakura-san. Excuse me, I did not know you were going out."

Sakura opens her mouth, then closes it, opens it again. He waits for an answer that doesn't come. After a moment, he shifts his weight, eyes flickering between some place over her shoulder and her face.

"I won't keep you, my apologies. I only wished to give you these." His hands raise just as her eyes lower, and she is presented with a bouquet of flowers. It is a nice one, small and delicate, nothing flashy, and Sakura recognises the work of Ino's mother in the arrangement of the colourful flowers.

Her mouth feels dry all of a sudden.

They stand like this for a moment, neither of them moving, before Neji clears his throat again. "I will – leave you to it, then."

When she still makes no move to take the flowers, merely gaping at them while her brain, usually so bright and quick, is absolutely _void_ of anything, he hunches his shoulders, all but thrusts the bouquet into her face and pivots on his heel. The way he ducks his head makes her hearth clench, and she blurts out, "Wait!"

She swears she sees him jump a bit, except – this is Neji Hyuga. Neji Hyuga does not jump, right? He slants her a glance over his shoulder, eyes spelling out plainly the conflicting emotions that never show on his face.

"I was… actually going to see you."

He turns more fully at that, slowly, as if unsure what to make of her words.

"Would you… would you like to come in?"

He gazes at her, hesitating, before he slowly nods. Sakura shuffles to the side, wordlessly inviting him into her home.

The flowers in her arms smell sweet, and they tickle her nose with their feathery petals as he slowly moves past her into the dim light of her entry hall.

* * *

**A/N.: **not really happy with the title of the chapter, but I couldn't think of anything else.

Thanks to all the people who reviewed!  
Happy Update-Monday! :)

Lots of love,

planless


	4. the getup

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**the getup**

* * *

"I am sorry to come by unannounced."

She notes the way he relaxes minutely once the door closes behind him, as if the threat of immediate rebuttal has vanished, but there is still a tension in the way he holds himself.

For the first time, Sakura notes what he is wearing.

The traditional Hyuga robes, the ones she would swear he was born in because he never takes them off, are replaced with a simple shirt and jeans. His hair, usually tied back, flows free and unbound down his shoulders and around his face. It brings out an uncharacteristic softness that is usually belied by the prominent display of his sharply slanted cheekbones.

It is the most casual getup she has ever seen him in.

She stares.

He shifts from one foot to the other.

Hesitates.

"What did you want to see me for?"

She gapes at him, still at a loss for words, before her brain jumps back into action and the basic rules of hospitality her mother drilled into her when she was still a child push to the front of her mind.  
"Would you like some tea?" she blurts out. She winces when she sees his confusion grow, along with his tension. "I mean… then we can talk… about things. Over a cup of tea." He looks at her wearily for a moment longer before releasing a small huff that sounds almost as amused as bemused. His shoulders drop a fraction.

"If you wish. Thank you."

He follows her quietly as she steps past him into the kitchen and flicks on the kettle.

He watches silently as she hunts around her cupboards for a vase, places the flowers on the windowsill, nervous fingers tugging and pulling to make sure they are arranged _just so_.

He smiles for the briefest moment when she jumps at the kettle going off.

He accepts the cup of tea she presses into his hands, and follows her example when she all but falls into one of the high stools at her breakfast counter. As he slides into the chair with a feline grace, so unfamiliar in both his appearance and her kitchen, Sakura takes a deep breath. Hands clasped firmly around her steaming cup of tea, she tries to sort out her thoughts, tries to get a good angle from which to start.

Neji beats her to the punch.

"I wish to apologise," he says, stunning her into silence. She stares at him as he turns white eyes on her, only to drop his gaze down to his hands.

"I realise that I have sprung the topic on you, and in hindsight I know I should have handled it more delicately. However..."

Sakura's heart sinks as she thinks about what she is about to tell him. Her throat constricts as he looks at her, peeking up at her almost shyly from beneath his lashes.

He looks _so bloody young_.

"I don't think I can ever express to you how thrilled I was when you accepted." Sakura swallows back her tears.

_Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry_…

Wide eyed, she stares at him. Neji is silent for a moment, waiting for her to react. When she doesn't, his shoulders bunch back up.

"I mean… I didn't think… what with being from the side branch and – I always thought once the time came I'd be able to…" He stops, looks at her for a moment. The corner of his mouth quirks up in a dry half-smile.

"I'm messing this up, aren't I?"

* * *

**A/N.: **happy update monday! I've got nothing to say this week, except that I handed im my bachelor thesis today. Here's to hoping they won't notice the two glaring mistakes in formatting right on the first page. I hate myself.

As always, thank you for your reviews, Jess and Tobi. I'm curious for how long you'll stay with me until you get bored of my tiny chapters.

Lots of love,

planless


	5. acts of volition

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**acts of volition**

* * *

Sakura can't help it.

She breaks into tears.

All the worrying, the sleepless nights, the guilt, it all slams into her as she see's his face light up in a mixture of hopefulness and fear.

In that moment he looks so _bloody young_.

Sakura _knows _Neji.

She knows he is inherently good. That, behind that stoic façade, there beats a heart which is just as big as Naruto's. She knows he would do anything for his family and the village. Just as he always has.

Him asking her to marry him – _her_, the person with a temper to rival Tsunade's, _her_, the person who has sniped at him about his uptightness more often than she cares to admit, _her_, who gets drunk in public with her friends with a clockwork regularity that boarders on religion…

Her, the one person she swears his family will not approve of. She knows what this means. It means that Neji is clawing for the last bit of freedom he will ever experience before entering the role as leader of his clan.

She thinks about her family. How she came home one day to her civilian parents and announced she was going to be a ninja. How she entered the academy, graduated, sat down one day and wondered what she could do with the abilities given to her. How she approached Tsunade-shishou, asked her to take her on as an apprentice, out of her own free will.

She thinks about how she clawed her way to the top, out of the insignificance of her nondescript background, out of the genin-ranks, and become a jonin – all because of her own drive to be _better_.

And as she looks at Neji through her veil of tears, takes in his panicked face, she realises that, despite them sharing the same rank, their paths have been fundamentally different.

Because while she always just did what she wanted, he did what was expected of him.

Every choice, every advancement, every promotion is dictated by tradition, expectations, loyalty. It is what defined his childhood, his schooling, his career. One day, it will define his marriage.

Sakura feels almost suffocated by the sudden pang of understanding and the onslaught of sympathy that follows hot on its heels as she looks at the man before her who, so very unexpectedly, has fluttered into her kitchen.

* * *

**A.N.: **Happy update Monday!

I realise these chapters are sooo short and I'm sorry. The reason for that is actually that I set a timer of 20 minutes for each while I write them. It helps me get stuff done instead of just stairing despairingly at the screen.

Thank you for your reviews! See you next Monday :)

Lots of love,

planless


	6. shards and snow

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**shards and snow**

* * *

"You did _what_?" Ino screeches.

Sakura sighs and buries her face in her hands. Getting yelled at by her best friend seems to become a reoccurring theme in her life as of late.

"I can't believe you! How could you _not _break off the engagement? You've been crying about it for days!"

There's a crash that sounds distinctly like glass shattering.

Sakura peers out from between her fingers, only to see that, yes, Ino has indeed swiped the vase off the windowsill. The flowers Neji brought her lie on the ground before her kitchen sink in a mound of shards and splinters that glint like diamonds, loose petals still trailing in their wake and falling like snow.

"Honestly forehead, how can you be so dumb? You don't even know him! Not really, anyways!" Sakura closes her eyes. "Are you even listening to me?"

"Yes Ino, I'm listening."

Her friend draws herself up to her full height in front of Sakura, hands propped on her hips and eyes shooting daggers.

"So, pray tell, why are you _still _engaged?!"

Sakura hesitates. "I honestly don't know what happened. I was going to break it off, I swear I was. But then he was sitting there in my kitchen, and he was wearing jeans, and he was talking about the proposal and being from the side branch and he looked so – he looked so –"

She releases a strained huff. "And then I just started crying. I couldn't even get out a word."

Ino scoffs. "What? Just because he was relaying the tale of woe that is his life? And of course you fell for it. You with your big, dumb, soft heart. You can never say no to anyone. Hell, you probably would sell your hide if it meant you could make someone's life better. What is _wrong _with you?"

Sakura shrugs, earning a sharp poke to the forehead for her actions. Ino sighs, her anger seemingly burning itself out at the sight of her slumped friend. "But you'll talk to him again?"

Sakura nods. "Yes. He's coming over later today and I'll tell him."

Sliding out of her chair, she bends down to carefully pull the flowers Ino knocked down earlier out of the shattered glass that was once a vase.

"Good," Ino says, making no move to help as she watches her friend unapologetically.

"But until then… What was this about Hyuga in jeans?"

* * *

**A.N.:** Happy update Monday!

Thanks for your reviews, lovelies. More NejiSaku action next week. I'm curious what you'll have to say about it.

Have a good week!  
Lots of Love,

planless


	7. at odds

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**at odds**

* * *

When finally, _finally_, there sounds a knock on the door, Sakura almost jumps out of her skin.

Her knee slams against the low coffee table, toppling the cup of tea that is perched precariously on its edge and sending the ceramic hurtling through the air.

"Shit," Sakura hisses as she tries to catch the mug and piping hot water soaks her hand. The pain, as harsh its sting is, serves to rip her out of the nervous state she spent the last twenty minutes in.

Rising to her feet and putting the now empty cup back on the table, Sakura steps around the wet spot on the carpet and walks to her front door. She takes a deep breath before pulling it open, fully intending to not be sidetracked today.

Only to be sidetracked when she looks at Neji in full jonin uniform, flak jacket zipped up all the way, kunai holster strapped to his thigh. His hair is tied back in its usual low tail and Sakura is speechless at how good he looks.

She's seen him before in mission gear, she's used to the sight – but it's the softness around his mouth that strikes her. His face is friendly, void of its usual strained pinch, but his open expression does little to hide the insecurity playing behind his eyes.

He's happy to see her, she realises with a start, but he's also afraid.

Her heart twinges uncomfortably in her chest.

She stomps the feeling down back where it came from.

"Are you going on a mission?" she asks as she steps aside and lets him in. Neji moves past her carefully, almost as if afraid she might rescind her invitation. Sakura takes a fortifying breath.

"I'm expecting a summon," he replies evenly. His voice, contrary to his eyes, betrays nothing. No nerves, no insecurities. Its smooth timbre rolls over her in soothing waves. "I might have to cut our meeting short."

Sakura glances down at her watch, then nods. "That's alright," she says, slinking past him into the kitchen to grab a second cup. "Work comes first."

He doesn't answer but follows her into the living room. "Please, make yourself comfortable," she says, pointing to the couch.

She pours a cup of tea and hands it to him, and she notes how he is sitting on the very edge of the sofa, feet planted firmly on the ground, back straight. The image of resoluteness and unshakeable.

Now, this is a Neji she can deal with.

But her determination receives a slight dent when he, instead of the cup, reaches for her wrist, fingers closing lightly around it.

"What happened?" he asks as he examines the scalded skin, eyes wide and open and displaying plain worry.

"Oh, it's nothing, just a little burn," she is quick to reply, desperate to wipe that concerned look off his face.

It's chipping away at her resolve to break his heart.

Almost without conscious effort her chakra flares to engulf her hand and within seconds the skin is as good as new. Neji blinks, then turns his eyes back on her face. Sakura looks away, tucking her hair behind her ear nervously as she sinks onto the couch and pulls her legs up under her.

"Sorry," she begins, and at his questioning gaze elaborates. "For crying like that last time."

She doesn't miss the way his hands tighten minutely in his lap, nor the way his eyebrows scrunch in worry.

But the smile he gives her is open and real as he says, "It is alright. You have nothing to apologise for."

* * *

**A.N.: **Happy update-Monday!

I hope you had an okay week. As always, thank you for your reviews. I felt kind of uninspired over the last couple days, but I still hope you like this chapter at least somewhat. I know its not perfect, and I'll probably rewrite it at some point, but for now it'll do.

Lots of love,

planless :)


	8. slipping

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**slipping**

* * *

Sakura is aware she is rambling, and she is also aware that she is stalling, but she's still waiting for the opportune moment to break the news to him. At the rate she's going, she thinks it might never come.

Just as planned she launched into the speech she thought out with Ino, the one that begins with her commenting on his sense of duty and ends with him breaking off the engagement.

Only it doesn't.

Because as soon as she reaches the point where she tells him that she knows he is only doing this out of loyalty to his clan, and is about to release him from his obligation, he cuts in.

"I didn't."

Sakura sputters, then falls silent.

Stares at him as he looks at her, a frown marring his features, before he drops his gaze back down to the mug he is holding in both hands, a faint blush dusting his cheeks. Otherwise he looks composed.

They sit for a while, neither of them saying a word.

Seconds tick by, and she's acutely aware of the invitation hanging in the air between them. Only she can't take him up on it. Ever.

"I didn't ask you out of obligation to the clan. If anything…" He glances at her, and his lips curl into a wry smile. Sakura understands. If anything, he's done it in spite of his clan.

There is another stretch of silence, then: "I never expected you to say yes."

She hesitates. "Then why did you ask?"

Neji shrugs. "Why did you agree?"

She can see him slipping. _He knows_, she realises.

With a lump in her throat, it is all she can do to sit in silence and watch as the stoic mask she is so used to seeing on him slips back into place. The nervous hunch of his shoulders relaxes, just like the flush on his cheeks fades out of existence. He looks at her, his face controlled and aloof. "I will not hold –"

A knock interrupts him and causes both of them to turn their heads. There, perched precariously on the windowsill, is a masked and hooded figure, holding up a scroll. Neji gets up, crosses the room and undoes the latch. The scroll is tossed into his hands and the ANBU disappears.

"This would be your cue, I guess," Sakura says softly.

Feeling incredibly self-conscious, she rises from the couch and crosses over to stand next to him. "It would seem so," he answers, not looking at her as he scans the missive.

She waits quietly for him to finish reading, her heavy conscience making her feel almost queasy. Gone is the shy smile he gave her when he entered her front door. Now when he turns to look at her, his expression is shuttered.

He doesn't seem angry, but there is no warmth left.

"I apologise for having to cut our conversation short," he says and bows at the waist.

_Ever so formal_, she thinks as she wraps her arms around her midsection. "I will come find you once I return. Then we will talk."

And then he's gone, vaulting over rooftops so quickly her eyes have difficulty tracking him.

A quick glance at her watch tells her it has taken her all of twenty minutes to drive a wedge between them that, even though she has achieved her goal, makes her wish the ground would open up and swallow her just so she could escape the shame she feels burning at the back of her throat.

With a sigh and a little sniffle, Sakura pushes the window shut and locks it.

* * *

**A/N: **Hey there! Sorry there was no update last week, but the semester break is over and uni's been crazy busy. I'm behind with all my work, and I have no idea how in the world I am supposed to catch up. So something had to give. But now I'm back with a somewhat doable work schedule, so here you go! An update! :)

On a similar note, I've decided to shift my update day from Monday to Friday, because my Monday's are so full I barely know where to find the time. I hope you won't mind.

Thank you for sticking around!  
*hands out leftover Halloween candy* What did you dress up as? This year I went as a scarecrow with a real pumpkin over my face, with LEDs fixed to the inside. It was sooo cool, but super heavy. My neck and shoulders hurt like something mean.

I wish you all a pleasant weekend!

Kind regards,

planless


	9. grace and dignity

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**grace and dignity**

* * *

Days pass, and Neji does not return.

Sakura can't say she's angry at him for it. It gives her more time to think, clear her head. It also gives her time to explain to Ino that, while she did not exactly explicitly _state _that this marriage is never going to happen, Neji is definitely _aware _of it.

Guilt still sits heavily in her stomach, but eventually – with a bit of help from Ino and some cheap wine – she manages to convince her conscience that things are better this way.

Who marries out of the goodness of their heart anyway?

Plenty of people, Ino informs her.

Okay, but who marries just out of a misguided sense of duty that only leads into matrimonial martyrdom?

Plenty of people, Ino informs her here as well.

Okay, but seriously, who marries their _colleague _from _work_ whom they never exchanged more that two sentences in a row with simply because he spontaneously proposed in front of his entire family, the proposed-to said "okay" because they were drunk, and later on were to much of a ninny to break off the engagement out of fear of hurting the proposer's feelings?

Ino is silent for a moment, then shrugs. "No one", she says, "because you're not going to marry him."

Sakura sighs and tips back her wine.

The next morning she wakes up with a pounding hangover – no, scratch that. She wakes up with a hangover, the pounding is very much real and very much very loud.

_Neji_, she thinks immediately.

Gently shoving a still snoring Ino off her, Sakura rolls out of bed and throws on the first articles of clothing in reach – her jonin uniform, always meticulously folded on top of the dresser. Running her hands through her hair in an attempt to look at least somewhat presentable, Sakura stumbles through the hallway to the front door.

Familiar white eyes greet her as she throws it open, but the face they sit in is not the one she expected.  
"Hiashi-sama," she stammers. "What –"

The clan head's cool gaze slides over her, causing her brain to grind to a screeching halt. "I apologise for knocking quite so hard. But you did not answer the first three times."

Sakura takes a deep breath and tries to gather her composure.

"Excuse me, I was otherwise enga-… busy," she finishes lamely. "Please," she then adds, bowing low at the waist. _A dangerous move_, her upset stomach informs her. She does her best to ignore the queasiness. "Would you like to come in?"

The Hyuga steps past her and waits for her to close the door. "Haruno-san, I wished to talk to you about my nephew."

Sakura gulps, then nods. Here comes the inevitable.

"Maybe the living room would be a better place to…" She trails off, wincing as she remembers the empty glasses and bottles of wine stacked on the coffee table. "Or would you care for some tea?"

Hiashi inclines his head regally. "Tea would be welcome, thank you."

Glad to have successfully averted at least this crisis, Sakura leads him into her kitchen, noting with relief it shows no signs of the impromptu booze-up she and Ino had the night prior. As she flicks on the kettle and coaxes her best tea set from its honorary place way up on the top shelf, she decides there is no reason to draw this out unnecessarily.

"This is about my –" she winces. "_Engagement _to Neji-san, I assume?" Hiashi's eyes flick over her face. In them she sees none of the pent up anger she expected to be met with. There is no fury, no indignation, only an unsettling calm that makes her feel as if that man knows everything.

She turns away and prepares their tea.

"Thank you," he says when she finally hands him his cup. He waits until she as well has settled herself in one of the high barstools and taken her first sip of tea, before he inclines his head a fraction.

"Yes," he says. "That is what I have come to talk to you about."

Steeling herself for whatever is to come, Sakura squares her shoulders and lifts her chin. She can take it.

Whatever he throws her way, she will handle it with grace and dignity.

* * *

**A/N:** I hope you all had a good week! Thank your for your reviews.

As always, lots of love!  
planless


	10. meanings

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**meanings**

* * *

Sakura almost blows her tea out through her nose as it goes down the wrong pipe in her shock.

Coughing and sputtering, she reaches for a napkin, aware of the picture she must paint but too busy not choking in order to contain herself. Once the fit has abated and she is left red-faced, breathing ragged and tears of pain in her eyes, she shoots Hiashi an incredulous look.

"Pardon me?"

He looks at here with the same calm as before, clearly unimpressed with her near-death experience.

"I see you weren't aware, after all," he muses, and takes a delicate sip from his cup. He seems thoughtful.

"No!" Sakura protests. "If I was, I would never have – I'd never…" She trails off, herself unsure of what she never would have done. "Agreed?" Hiashi finishes her sentence. Sakura only looks at him, all fight gone from her body.

"I never noticed," she whispers eventually. Hiashi inclines his head.

"I did not expect you to. Neji can be – guarded about these matters. I should not have told you."

"No," Sakura agrees, wearily raking a hand through her hair. "No, you shouldn't have." Already, her guilty conscience is back, roiling around in her stomach and making her feel sick.

"I apologise. Nevertheless, Haruno-san." He looks at her sharply. "The engagement cannot stand. In his position as heir to the entire clan, Neji's bride will be chosen for him. She will have to fulfil certain criteria and these, you will forgive me for saying so, Haruno-san, you simply do not meet."

She is ready to bite back, already drawing breath in preparation to voice her indignant anger at the quip, but Hiashi continues on. "You have never been trained to run an estate. You do not know the first thing about managing servants. Your etiquette is severely lacking. You are a shinobi on active duty, and retirement in the near future is out of the question for you, I assume."

Sakura only stares at him dumbly. Everything he says rings true.

In a completely unexpected show of humanity, Hiashi smiles, although only a bit – at least, she thinks she sees the corners of his mouth twitch upwards. "Had the houses not conjoined, and had Neji not agreed to step into his role as heir to the clan, I would have allowed him complete autonomy when it came to choosing his bride. His family owes him that, at least. As it stands, the two of you would only make each other unhappy since your very situations make you incompatible."

He rises to his feet and moves past a flabbergasted Sakura, whose groggy brain is still trying to figure out whether he just insulted or complimented her.

"The engagement cannot stand."

His words cut through her thoughts like a knife. She meets his gaze in a sudden moment of clarity.

"I know. I think he knows, too. We're going to talk about it when he gets back."

Hiashi considers this for a moment, then nods.

He walks out of her kitchen to the main door and Sakura, remembering her manners, follows him. She is about to wish him a pleasant day when he turns around, thanks her for her hospitality and, catching her completely of guard, adds thoughtfully, "Had Neji not assumed the role of clan heir, I would have congratulated him on his chosen bride. But the way things are, it is my daughter who is granted the privilege of marrying freely. And perhaps that is not without its merit, either."

Giving her a meaningful glance, he turns around and leaves.

Sakura leans heavily against the doorframe as she stares after his back. The meaning of his words is not lost on her.

It is with a heavy heart and sick feeling to her stomach that Sakura crawls back into bed, ignoring Ino's sleepy protest as she pushes her body to the side and climbs under the covers.

"Wh'wzzt?" the blonde mumbles as she curls up against Sakura. For a moment, she contemplates lying. She sighs.

"Hiashi Hyuga. He stopped by personally to tell me to break off the engagement with his nephew."

"'Mkay," sounds the drowsy reply.

Silence. Then.

"_What?_"

* * *

**A/N: **I actually quite liked writing this chapter. I'm a real fan of the Hiashi who is wise, more tolerant and softer than he was in his younger years, and who genuinely cares for the well-being of his children and takes an interest in their emotional lives. Also, more rational reasons for why this marriage should never take place! Hach, gotta love them. I'm excited what you guys will think about next Friday's update, hehehe. We're getting the ball rolling!

Also, **whoop whoop**! First ten chapters down! *hands myself a tiny congratulatory cake*

Lots of love!

planless


	11. congratulations

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**congratulations**

* * *

Days blur into weeks.

Weeks stretch into a month, and with every hour that passes, Sakura grows surer and surer of her position.

She regains her footing.

She dutifully receives every scolding directed her way, rejects a hundred different well-wishers with gentle comments that the wedding isn't taking place after all. She trains, she works, and slowly, a semblance of normalcy returns into her life.

People stop pointing and whispering. They stop peering for a ring. Nobody is begging for wedding invitations anymore.

And yet she is still engaged. In a way, at least.

And Neji is still not back.

If Sakura didn't know he was on a mission, she would think that he's avoiding her. But he would never do that, would he? She supposes he's too stubborn for that.

The reluctant estimate Tsunade gave Sakura on when he should be back is approaching quickly and with every day that passes she feels more nervous.

She counters it in the only way she knows how: she buries herself in work.

This is how she finds herself now standing in front of the hokage's office, balancing an abundance of medical scrolls in one arm, free hand poised to knock, when a light cough behind her draws her attention. Turning around, she can only stare at the sight.

Neji looks much like she remembers him.

Contrary to what her brain has cooked up he appears to be neither dead nor maimed, and he also has not sprouted a second head that would force him to forever hide himself away and never seek her out again.

His face seems a bit haggard, but that is to be expected after a month-long deployment.

He looks good, she realises with a start. His dark brown hair is framing his eyes, which hold none of the coldness she saw when last they spoke. Instead, he regards her with a little smile that is equal parts knowing and sad.

He couldn't have guilt-tripped her more effectively if he had tried.

Sakura has thought of a million different ways in which to possibly approach this conversation. Her mind has played through all the emotions: anger, tears, dignified, cold, unapproachable, understanding, kind.

But all her ideas are booted solidly out the window by Neji's heavy sigh.

Before Sakura even knows what she's doing she throws her arms around him, fingers clawing at the back of his flak jacket, face burrowed in his chest. All around them, her scrolls clatter to the ground in a merry staccato and once they fall quiet all that can be heard is her desperate "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I am so _so sorry_…"

Hesitantly, Neji's arms come up to rest lightly, almost awkwardly, around her shoulders.

"It's alright, Sakura-san," he murmurs into her hair, and she wishes she could die of shame at his understanding tone. Pressing her face more fully into his chest so she won't have to look at him, she wills away the tears.

He smells of sweat and blood and dirt.

"I have had enough time to think it over while I was away, and I realise that what I have done is… dumb." The word falls from his lips with such dry finality that she can't help a strangled laugh. It comes out as more of a sob.

His arms slide off her shoulders and he gently cups her face in his hands. Sakura shakes her head and presses closer – she doesn't want to look at him.

His huff carries frustration, but also a hint of fond amusement that feels as if he's thrust a hand straight into her chest. Because the truth is there, she hears it; but she is not sure she could ever reciprocate.

"Sakura," he murmurs, and she caves. Turning her face to look up at him, she allows him to run his calloused thumbs over her cheeks. They come away tearstained.

"Neji," she bursts out, "I am so incredibly sorry, I don't know what – I'm such an idiot, I never meant to – I, I –"

He looks at her. His gaze is fond but his smile is ever so sad as he says, "No, it is I who should apologise. I had no business thrusting you into this situation. And I should have realised this sooner. Only I was so elated at the thought that you – that the woman I –" He stops and huffs in wry amusement.

"I will not hold you to your word, Sakura. I release you from our engagement."

And, almost as if to seal his words, he brushes his lips over hers in a fleeting caress that would not have passed for a kiss even if you were squinting against the sun.

Her toes don't curl.

"But still," he says, and his breath ghosts over her face because he's still so close.

The ground doesn't open up beneath her.

"It was a pretty dream."

The world keeps turning and Sakura holds back a sob as he steps away and bends down to pick up her fallen scrolls. By the time he pushes them into her arms, she has managed to compose herself, at least a little.

"Neji," she blurts out and without thinking grasps his hand just as he raises his arm to knock on the hokage's door. He half turns and meets her gaze steadily. His calm face and the relaxed slope of his shoulders somehow give her the strength to soldier on.

"I hope things can still be okay between us. I really am sorry. I don't think I can ever express how much."

He smiles a bit at that, a sad little smile, really, and perhaps also a bit resigned, and gives her fingers a quick squeeze. "I know."

He straightens, knocks, pushes the door open. Sakura follows in his wake, now slightly more in control of her emotions.

The hokage's chair is turned to face the window. All they can see as they enter is her blond hair peeking over the backrest.

"I hope you're glad," Tsunade's dry voice carries through the room. The door behind them clicks shut and she swivels around in her chair.

"Because these," she stabs with one finger at a neatly stacked bundle of missives, "are congratulatory notes from three out of the five major hidden villages, as well as the daimyo himself. Congratulations."

Her honey-brown eyes stare them down unflinchingly, communing from the very beginning that there is to be no arguing in this matter.

"You're getting married."

* * *

**A/N: **Thank you guys for all your feedback on this story so far! I hope you don't find it all _too _boring up until now.

If you're only here for the NejiSaku-fix, you're in luck, the next couple chapters will feature the two of them almost exclusively!

Please keep in mind that this story, despite having a progressing plot line it follows, portrays only snippets and glimpses rather than every event. So if some chapters seem to lack a connection to the previous ones, it is because there's a little time skip in between, and/or I've decided to leave certain things out. Those omissions will always be referred to so you can at least form an idea of what happened in the in-between, but please feel free to fill them with your own ideas and headcanon. I know I do.^^

I wish you a lovely weekend.

Lots of love,

planless


	12. the sun still sets in the west

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**the sun still sets in the west**

* * *

Peering down the steep drop to her left, Sakura wonders if it would be enough.

It's high, for sure, but she's a shinobi. She's fallen from greater heights and survived, thanks to the reflexes Tsunade-shishou drummed into her years ago. She might have to paralyse herself in order to keep her survival instinct from acting up.

Abandoning any half-baked thoughts of suicide, Sakura lets her gaze sweep over the sprawling village that stretches before her.

It all seems so peaceful from the top of the hokage-monument. Like nothing has changed.

Well, in a way it hasn't.

People still rise and go about their lives in the same age-old rhythm.

The sun still sets in the west.

Sakura's still engaged.

She sighs at the thought. Cradling her chin in her hand, Sakura wonders just when the crushing panic from before has simmered down into something much more bearable.

Perhaps between the third and fourth hour of straight-up bawling her eyes out.

And gods, did she cry. She wailed and screamed and cursed, liberated in her grief by the soundproof barrier she had the mind to erect before pretty much melting down. She alternated between full blown ugly panic attacks and tears quietly slipping down her cheeks as she stared off in the distance.

And through it all, Konoha kept on pulsing far below.

Tobirama Senju, atop whose stone head she is seated, still watches over his subjects with a stern brow, and high above him the sun still follows its lazy arc through the sky.

The world as Sakura knows it remains unchanged, indifferent to her plight.

Somehow, that thought makes it easier.

The knowledge that although her life has been sent spiralling out of control, the bigger picture remains unchanged. Like a steadily beating heart, it is unaltered in its existence.

The despair that should rise up in great waves and churn wildly and smother her beneath all its overbearing weight floods forward to lightly lap at her toes.

Life could go on for her as well, if she just let it.

With a frown, Sakura wonders where all that rage and panic and frustration have disappeared to. Before, she was so filled with emotion. Now there is… nothing. Sure, she still feels indignation and fear and a slight whisper of panic, but the fire has pretty much burned itself out.

This… this she finds much more manageable.

Leaning back onto one elbow, she pats the nidaime's sun-warmed head with her free hand as she lets her gaze wander over the buildings sprawling beneath the cliff.  
"You wouldn't have cared, would you?" she asks the stone figure beneath her. "As long as the village was safe, you would have been fine with anything."

There is no answer, which somehow serves to put her situation even more into perspective.

No, it's not so very bad. The world will keep on turning, whether she marries Hyuga Neji or not.

She will strive to make the best of it.

Speaking of Neji…

A whisper of amused indignation curls around the corners of Sakura's mouth. He's left her to her own devices long enough.

If the trashy romance novels she sometimes nicks from Ino hold even a shred of truth, the knight will soon arrive to collect his errant fiancée princess. He will soothe her misery and win her over with declarations of his undying devotion, upon which she will fall in love with him, making the arranged marriage appear like a blessing, and they both will live happily ever after.

Only there is no misery to soothe. Not anymore. And Neji isn't one for expressing emotion coherently in a way that would make any maiden swoon, she's gathered that much already.

Settling back more comfortable against the warmth of the stone beneath her, Sakura folds her arms behind her head and gazes up at the sky forlornly.

No. The two of them will take effort.

Lots of it.

And Sakura can't help herself, but she is still frustrated enough to put most of the blame for her dilemma at Neji's feet. So she'll be making him do most of the work.

Starting with him coming here to enquire after her well-being, then escorting her home and treating her to a nice bottle of wine; something more expensive than she would usually go for. Then, once they are drunk enough, they will head over to the training grounds and she will break every bone in his body. Twice. And then…

Sakura sighs. And then she will feel terribly guilty and empty.

Because in a way, Neji is in the same situation as her. Sure, he is the one who originally did the stupid proposing, but it is her who said yes. So really, they are equally to blame.

And as it stands, they are now both forced into a marriage neither of them wants, although for different reasons.

No, she can't really hold this against him.

Still, she thinks. It's still at least fifty-one percent his fault, so he'll have to work for it. A little bit.

And she'll start by making him come collect his errant bride.

* * *

**A/N:** What do you think? More Neji in the next chapter!

Thank you for your reviews! :) I hope you had a good week.

Lots of love,

planless


	13. reading between the lines

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**reading between the lines**

* * *

By the time Neji shows up, reluctant and seemingly wishing to be anywhere but here, the sun is already setting.

Sakura doesn't say anything, merely watches as it slowly dips to disappear behind the horizon. The silence stretches on for the longest time until Neji eventually bends down next to her.

"Are you… alright?" he asks, voice curiously flat. She slants her gaze his way and sees a hundred different emotions play through his eyes that are at odds with his blank mien.

"Always so in control," she murmurs and lifts one hand to poke his cheek absentmindedly. He evades her questing fingers easy enough. "Yes," Sakura says then, sobering up, "I'm alright."

He blinks, relaxes a fraction. Sakura huffs and smiles. "Don't look so relieved. I still feel bad. But…" She meets his gaze, considers for a moment. "I don't hate it. Us, I mean."

Neji settles on his haunches. After a moments hesitation, he inclines his head. "I don't hate it, either," he admits quietly. "But still, I want you to know how incredibly sorry I am."

Sakura laughs a bit at this. "Me, too." Sending him a crooked smile, she leans back on her elbows and adds, "What a sorry bunch we are."

"Yes."

They sit quietly for a while as they watch the sun sink steadily lower, and Sakura is surprised at how easy it is to share this moment with him. There are still a hundred different things hanging unspoken between them, but its not uncomfortable. Neither Neji nor she are given to shirking their duties or skirting around topics. They'll talk it out eventually.

"We can make this work, right?"

The quiet question falls softly into the silence and takes Sakura by surprise. Looking up at Neji sitting next to her, her heart goes out to him when she sees his insecure expression.

"This doesn't have to be all bad."

For a moment, she merely watches him, trying to sort out the jumble of emotions inside her chest. In the sinking sun his skin glows golden, and his dark brown hair looks like threads of copper in the light. It makes him look radiant. Lively and warm.

"No," she allows at length. "It doesn't."

"I do hope this doesn't jeopardise our friendship."

She cocks her head as she translates. _I think of you as a friend. You're my friend. We can make this work, even just as friends. We're still friends, right? _So many hidden layers in one stilted phrase.

Sakura considers. Is she friends with Neji? The thought never crossed her mind. If she's completely honest with herself, she only ever thought of him as an acquaintance, although the kind that hovers on the brink of something more and might stumble forwards and become a friend if given the necessary push.

Only that push never came, and because Sakura did not think they had terribly much in common besides their unfailing work ethic, she never pursued the topic. She likes Neji, sure, appreciates him even, but _friends_?

_What a weirdly definite label_, she muses as she steadily gazes up at him. Still. She could consider him a friend, if he so wished.

Sakura isn't blind. She knows how easily she makes friends, and she is very aware of how much she cares for them.

But whether that kind of affection will be enough for a marriage… They'll have to see.

"No," she says, pushing up into a sitting position. Nudging her shoulder against his in a sudden moment of camaraderie, she smiles tiredly when he first tenses and then relaxes minutely at the contact.

"No, we're still friends."

* * *

**A/N:** sorry for the late update, life got terribly busy! I'll probably try to make up for it by banging out a couple more chapters over christmas, so stay tuned!

Lots of love,

planless


	14. regress

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**regress**

* * *

_You're a fool. You're so incredibly foolish. It is as if all your growth, all your training, have been for nothing. Still the same impulsive little girl you've always been. Are. Will always be. Still weak. Still too emotional. Everything you tried to outgrow. Everything you thought you'd left behind. You keep dragging it back up. Just can't help yourself, can you? Disgusting. Weak. A waste. _

Get out.

* * *

**A/N: **–


	15. the first meeting

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**the first meeting**

* * *

"So is she to no longer take missions then?"

"She will continue to work under the hokage, as her apprenticeship is not yet complete."

"And once it ends?"

"Then she will continue to serve as the hokage's personal assistant, to be sent on any assignment Tsunade-sama deems appropriate."

"But – you would lay affairs of the clan into someone else's hands?"

"With all due respect, Sakura-san is not an inherent part of the clan. Her duties are, and have always been, first and foremost to the godaime. If that is not something you are comfortable with, I invite you to take it up with the hokage herself."

"I – no, that will not be necessary. But if she is sent on missions, what about the danger? Surely you realise the need to produce an heir –"

Sakura only sits and stares at her knees, letting the chatter of the Hyuga clansmen wash over her. As far as Tsunade is concerned, her apprenticeship is finished, of that she's sure. The hokage has made it quite clear Sakura is not to show her face in her office _ever_, after an explosion of temper that took on almost epic proportions.  
That night, Sakura cried herself to sleep.

If she thought getting her heart broken feels terrible, it is nothing compared to the gaping emptiness that threatened to swallow her the moment the woman Sakura had come to think of as almost a mother told her to never bother her again.

The need to curl in on herself and cry rushes back violently; she squashes it down and instead focuses on the people in front of her. The elders are accosting Neji ceaselessly, and he seems determined to face them down at every turn. Why he insists on bending his clan's traditions for her sake, she doesn't know. She's grateful nevertheless.

"So what about the wedding ceremony? Should we begin sending out invitations?"

Next to her, Neji shifts. Sakura peeks up to see him looking at her from the corner of his eye before turning his attention back on his family.  
"No. A small wedding will do fine for us, thank you."

"But Neji-sama, surely you realise the representational –"

"There is," Neji interrupts, seemingly beyond caring, "the distinct possibility that another wedding might take place in the near future. If experience serves well, it would be best not to strain our finances before that. I somewhat expect half the world to attend."

The last bit is delivered with a dry humour that in any other circumstance would make Sakura laugh. As it is, she merely frowns. It is clear that Neji is alluding to Naruto and Hinata, and Sakura does not think his estimate at the number of wedding guests is so far off the mark. Her loudmouthed teammate makes friends wherever he goes, after all.

"Now, if that is all for today…" Murmurs of assent sound, and a general shuffling picks up. Neji rises to his feet, and after a moments hesitation Sakura follows.

She realises that Hiashi has not uttered a single word throughout the entirety of the meeting and slants him a curious glance, only to find that he is watching them both thoughtfully from where he is still seated on the floor.

"Come," Neji says to her, the firm tone of his voice belying the gentle hand he lays on her shoulder as he guides her out of the room.

"I will walk you home."

* * *

**A/N: **Happy Christmas, everyone! Here's a little update to give you something more than the measly few lines that were the last chapter.

I'm really not sure where this story is headed. While **and the scarry skies above **seems to go over fairly well with the general crowd and I like writing it, out of the two of them this story kind of feels like the ugly stepchild. It's awkward and you don't quite know what to do with it, but you love it nevertheless and won't give up on it. Also, it's fun to word-vomit all over.

So, yeah...

I hope you're still along for this fairly planless ride! (I have some ideas of what to do with this, and they all have to do with raising this story on a different level. So it wont remain all useless drivel forever. If you care to stick around that long.)

Lots of love and happy holidays!

planless


	16. coming to terms with it

**twenty minutes**

* * *

**coming to terms with it**

* * *

"You were great in there."

The words are simple, spoken without admiration or indeed any kind of appreciation. They merely are the truth.

Neji sighs and drags a hand over his face, the gesture conveying a tiredness that is at odds with the firm way he holds himself.

"Council sessions are always tiring. I didn't like them when I was not –" He stops, seems to consider. "And now I like them even less. It does not help that Hiashi-sama has been holding back recently."

"Yes, I noticed. What was that about?" Despite her gloominess, Sakura can't help but feel the slightest bit of curiosity. Neji huffs.

"I wouldn't know," he answers even as he walks her up the stairs to the door of her apartment. "He never shared his reasoning."

Fishing around in her obi for her keys, Sakura looks up at him thoughtfully. "Maybe it's a test, to see how well you can keep up against the pressure of your family."

He glowers. "I do not enjoy being tested or paraded around." Sakura merely shrugs as she unlocks her door.

"Nevertheless, you did good."

Stepping into her apartment, she toes off her geta before turning around to look up at him.

"You know," she begins. "Thank you, for what you did in there. I realise you are facing down your clan in order to make things easier for me."

"I try," he sighs. "I am simply glad I managed to bully them out of a traditional ceremony. If it were up to me, it would only be the two of us and the wedding administrator."

"If it were up to me, we would not get married at all," Sakura smiles wryly. "But still – I'm glad it's you, if anyone. Just imagine the same thing had happened with Kiba, or Shikamaru. God knows what a disaster that would be."

He gives her a little smile in return, although it seems sad. "I never took you for such a romantic."

"Oh haha," she quips and shuts the door in his face. Before it closes all the way, she peers up at him and gives him a tired smile. "I'll see you tomorrow?"

He nods. "Yes. Same time."

Sakura sighs. "Great. More clan meetings."  
The door shuts with a quiet _click_.

* * *

**A/N: ** –


End file.
